Yesterday in positive parenting class, I was overwhelmed to the point of tears — (shocker, right?). Ten moms were back for week four out of our six week positive parenting class, and with littles on laps and running around, we settled in to listen and share about our week.
How had it gone? Where had we broken through? Where had we felt stopped?
The moms in this sacred circle of mothers listening to other mothers told story after story of life with littles.
- Of trips to the zoo with the kids where the zoo turned out to be closed.
- Of cooking with a two year old and wanting to let them scoop up the flour by themselves but at the very same time, NOT wanting to let them scoop up the flour by themselves.
- Of couches jumped on, limits tested and words that seemingly fell on deaf ears.
- Of meltdowns managed and high emotions that were hard to be with.
And in story after story, though most were sharing moments they thought they’d failed or needed help in managing a different way, all I could hear were moments to to be CELEBRATED.
Kids were crying. Life was messy. These were challenging moments to be sure. But here is the thing, these parents were ROCKING the challenges before them.
Unknowingly, as these moms were sharing their struggles, they were also sharing their successes.
They shared about letting go of perfect and accepting instead what life delivered — the moment that was right in front of them.
They shared about patience. Of deep breaths taken. Of yelling avoided and of yelling not avoided and even some apologies that followed.
What brought me to my emotional knees was the idea that these parents did not know, really KNOW, deep in their hearts, how truly awesome they were.
(How perfect?!? No, but thankfully, perfect is not in our parenting job description.)
I remember this place. This “I’m not enough” place. I parented from it for many years. It’s a place healing inside of me just a little bit more every day. It’s the place that propels me to remind you of one very important thing in case you too have forgotten.
You. Are. Awesome.
That’s it. Period. End of story. You are.
Be gentle with yourself on this parenting journey. As gentle as you hope to be with your kids. Be encouraging. Give yourself props for being the parent you are. Today.
The greatest gift we can give our kids is not to be perfect. It is to be NOT PERFECT, and to love ourselves anyway.
When it comes to your kids and to your parenting, know this single thing deep in your heart.
You are enough.
Just keep showing up – for yourself, for your kids, and for your family – and remember to celebrate you.
PS: If you liked this post, please click “like” above, share it and/or join our community of mindful parents. You will receive gentle parenting tips as well as a free gift direct to your inbox — Hug Each Moment Kit, a journal for you to keep, helping you to write love notes once a year to each of your children from birth to ten. (And a promise – I protect your email with my life — no spam allowed!)
Suzanne Tucker, CEIM, Parent Educator:
In over two decades as a physical therapist and parent educator Suzanne has help thousands connect on a deeper level to themselves and their families, teaching Infant Massage and Positive Parenting to organizations and individuals all over the world. Creator of My Mommy Manual, a website/community inspiring parents to “look inside (yourself) for instructions”, author and co-founder of Brentwood Center of Health, a holistic rehabilitation center, Suzanne lives in Saint Louis, Missouri with her husband, their four children, and far too many pets to mention.