I have been mama to one sweet baby girl and one sweet baby boy for all of 15 days. Though the main question I hear from friends and family is “How is it GOING?”, the concerned look in their eyes and the tone of their voice says something more like “How completely insane is your life these days?!@#!!!” I feel almost bad as I sit to journal with you today that I don’t have a bunch of “how-insane-my-life-is-with-newborn-twins” stories to share. Am I in denial? No. So why am I not pulling my hair out or falling down with sleep deprivation? In a word: S-U-P-P-O-R-T. My friends and family are teaching me the real meaning [Read more…]
Yesterday I was blue. Not dark blue…more like a gray, powder blue…like a light drizzle on an overcast winter day (which would actually describe yesterday’s weather). Does that ever happen to you? You just wake up and feel blue…no real cause for it that you can see. I looked to my heart for a sign that would tell me what the cause might be, but there was none. I got that it just was. I just was. Maybe you’ve felt this way too. A feeling shows up like an ache in your heart or a pang in the pit of your stomach. It’s always there somewhere in the body. For me it was a sadness that showed up like a lovely ache in my heart. It felt like an expansion. Like a good stretch to tight muscles taken right up to that edge between pleasure and pain.
Yesterday I was at that edge…stretching, holding, breathing and stretching some more. I wrote in my journal, “how can we all be so connected and yet feel the divide at times so deep within ourselves?”