Could Spanking Be the Answer?

© Andrew Taylor | Dreamstime Stock Photos

© Andrew Taylor | Dreamstime Stock Photos

If you spank your kids and/or you believe in spanking as a form of discipline let me say this before you read any further: 1) If we knew each other in real life, I’m guessing we’d have more in common than we wouldn’t. 2) Inspite of our differences on this topic, we can share our thoughts and experiences with love and respect. And most importantly, 3) alone we are a drop, together… an ocean. xo

After this facebook conversation on spanking, I wanted to share more in-depth on the topic with links, resources etc. I hope you find the research articles and resources listed supportive, especially if you’re having this conversation offline with friends and family. And given that per most studies 70 to 90 percent of parents hit or slap their children as a form of discipline at varying frequencies nationwide, many of us are.

If you would like to comment below, please do!!! I ask this one thing: let’s talk about the research presented and refrain from shares that start with “in my personal experience…” or “I was hit/I was never hit and I turned out okay” as these are not up for debate. Let’s do something different than what is being done on parenting boards all over the internet and have a respectful (loving? Yes!!!!) discussion. See how this can be done in the comments following this post also on the topic of spanking.

Thank you!!!



Join with me and other moms here. The manual is ours to write but we don’t have to write it alone! Let’s connect on twitterfacebook and pinterest



Positive Parenting

Zen Mommy Minutes


Business Insider

Psychology Today 

Plain Talk About Spanking

Stop Hitting

Crystal Lutton

Arms of Love Family Fellowship

Report on Physical Punishment in the United States: What Research Tells Us About Its Effects On Children


Berlin, L.J., Ispa, J.M., Fine, M.A., Malone, P.S., Brooks-Gunn, J., Brady-Smith, C., et al. (2009).  Correlates and consequences of spanking and verbal punishment for low-income White, African American, and Mexican American toddlers. Child Development, 80, 1403-1420.

Gershoff, E.T. (2002). Corporal punishment by parents and association behaviors and experiences: A meta-analytic and theoretical review.Psychological Bulletin, 128, 539-579.

Gershoff, E. T. (2013). Spanking and child development: We know enough now to stop hitting our children. Child Development Perspectives, 7 (3), 133-137.

Gershoff, E.T., & Grogan-Kaylor, A. (2013). Spanking and its consequences for children: New meta-analyses and old controversies. Manuscript under review.

Gershoff, E.T., Lansford, J.E., Sexton, H.R., Davis-Kean, P.E., & Sameroff, A.J. (2012). Longitudinal links between spanking and children’s externalizing behaviors in a national sample of White, Black, Hispanic, and Asian American families. Child Development, 83, 838-843.


How Parenting Helps Me Grow

There is nothing like parenting to hold that mirror up to a grown person’s face (to my face, to your face…) and show us where we get to grow. Apparently I get to grow in patience and acceptance because these two keep showing up in my dang mirror. They were there yesterday, staring out at me. I recognized them right away.

My eight year old walked into the living room and saw it first. Instead of screaming at the horror she alone was witnessing (which, thinking back to being eight, could have been a fun thing to do) she ran to find me in the kitchen and broke it to me gently.

With big eyes and a shocked look on her face she said, “Mom, you are NOT going to like this.” She paused for dramatic effect. I froze and braced myself for impact.

“You are really going to freak out.”
[Read more…]