I have been mama to one sweet baby girl and one sweet baby boy for all of 15 days. Though the main question I hear from friends and family is “How is it GOING?”, the concerned look in their eyes and the tone of their voice says something more like “How completely insane is your life these days?!@#!!!” I feel almost bad as I sit to journal with you today that I don’t have a bunch of “how-insane-my-life-is-with-newborn-twins” stories to share. Am I in denial? No. So why am I not pulling my hair out or falling down with sleep deprivation? In a word: S-U-P-P-O-R-T. My friends and family are teaching me the real meaning [Read more…]
Zen Mommy Minute question of the week: Do you want a good, dutiful, well-behaved, grateful, respectful child? This video might have you think twice about this as a parenting “goal”… or at least I hope it will.
Duality. What are we teaching our children when the end goal of our parenting approach is to have a “good” child? Does it lead to excessive rigidity? Does it help our children learn to accept and manage the many emotions they feel? And finally, does it help our children come to know and love themselves? Please send me your thoughts. To read more on this, check out one of my favorite parenting reads, Alice Miller’s “For Your Own Good”. [Read more…]
Here are some thoughts about the words we use and ideas on how words can help or hurt us in our parenting. Whether you are pregnant with your first or raising teens, we can all benefit from watching for a few important words like should, try, need and MY/MINE and the messages they convey.
Our Expert Mommy, psychotherapist Shellie Fidell is also a regular on Great Day St. Louis. We loved her recent segment that shares her practical tips on how to manage the added stress of extended family… starting, yup… this week!
Do you have a story to share about a stress-free or stress-full holiday gathering? Share in the comments below. I know Sharon has a great one about a Green Bean Casserole…. 😉
I can hear Popeye now “I Yam what I Yam…”. Parent or not, this week, let’s embrace the “I” that is our “true-self”. Let’s allow the things we do with our kids during the day, at their schools, etc.. to flow from these innate parts of our personalities…
not from only a sense of duty or obligation. Our children will see us in our bliss and learn that they too can love who they are and use their gifts on a daily basis to make a difference in the world.
Let’s parent in a way that is in line with [Read more…]
I never thought to tell my toddlers not to put a big magnet against the TV screen. The green and purple spot on the TV screen is a permanent reminder of the warning that I never gave. They are now 11, 12 and 13 years old. The harm they could do or have happen to them has ramped up remarkably. I feel that I’ve entered an awkward stage right along with them. I’m fretting about how to continue to talk with them about puberty and sex.
Last monday was Yom Kippur, the Jewish Day of Atonement. I was reflective as I delivered my kids’ fancy shoes to their dad’s house for synagogue. What better time to reflect on… not just apologies but Beginning Anew. It’s not the first time I’ve heard of this ritual but most recently from Thay. The ritual, which can be done as often as you please, really is incredibly powerful in that it not only acknowledges any hurt and suffering that you may have caused but also plants the seeds of love. Another thing I love about it is its specificity. For me, the blanket… “I’m sorry for everything and anything I may have done in the past year to hurt you.” has always rung empty. Sorry for what??? [Read more…]
Long-time couple and Buddhist Dharma teachers Larry Ward and Peggy Rowe Ward offer The Three Keys and other concrete practices for the transformation of suffering and the establishment of happiness. Love’s Garden is an invitation to deepen our spiritual practice and strengthen our most important relationships.
This is Practical Mommy and I’m going to take a moment here to gush about Zen Mommy… who I’m quite certain is a pretty shade of *pink* right now!
Why? Because as much as I tell her how inspiring she is, NOW I have some validation from an objective third party! If you haven’t been tuning in to the lively discussion about her article, How to Recognize Warning Signs, you may have missed the amazingly cool response she’s been getting, especially from Bob Wan-Qi Kim (a.k.a. @journik). Check out this video he did ABOUT her!!! And not only is journik NOT her best girlfriend… he used to be a monk, so I’d posture that he knows a thing or two about “zen-ness!”
So feel free to add your thoughts to the conversation! What warning signs have you ignored?