How to Let Go: The Back Story

Is this a “How to Let Go” or a “How to Move On”? Or maybe it’s a “How to Be Successful”. Because, essentially, it is really a little of each and I was quite torn on which title would best suite this post. But for all intents and purposes, when listed in the preceding order these how-to’s are placed exactly in the order by which you would get yourself from the first point to the last point. So, maybe this should be a mini-series? I might just let you all decide.

I’m sure I’ve mentioned it somewhere before, I’m not one to let go. To me, letting go has always meant giving up. Except, maybe it’s really not.

I’ve always had a penchant for sticking things out. You know that one song with the lyrics that go, “hold on loosely, but don’t let go”? Try “hold on tightly and don’t let go.” That second one is me. Don’t get me wrong, perseverance is a mighty good thing but only to a point.

When I was in high school and I had to move to a different town I was determined to remain faithful to my boyfriend- even though my dad didn’t want me to have anything to do with him. No telephone contact. Not even letters. Only, the letters rule was a surprise. I found out when I accidentally stumbled on a few and a picture the boyfriend had sent me that didn’t make it to the trash can. I found a way to make contact. I didn’t date anyone else. I didn’t even go out because I didn’t want other guys to get the wrong idea. For  TWO YEARS!!!

Do you know how long that is in high school time? It’s kinda like dog years. In the end, there was an end. I met someone else and he wasn’t right for me either, but by that time I was much more willing to move on.

Flash forward a few years to my marriage. Crumbling after only TWO years. Hold on tightly, I thought. Don’t let go. But the tight holding only made things worse. It made the fighting worse. It made me miserable. I lost 20 pounds in just a few weeks time. And then I did it. I told my husband, “If you need to go, that’s okay. But I love you.” I left him alone. I let him think. I let myself think. Was this even what I wanted? [Read more…]

How To Make Time for Your Dreams

I had the HAPPIEST night ever on Tuesday night. We had a GNO. Like in real life! Not to knock our online GNO’s but sometimes, a girl’s just gotta be able to share the real deal: real food, real wine, and real hugs. We had, what Danielle dubbed “The Fashion Haul of All Fashion Hauls” at dotdotdash.

But in the midst of all the shopping fun, which is well documented in pics and video footage, was a very heartfelt message for us moms.

Depending on your stage of life (or even your stage of motherhood), you may find yourself having to shelve the dreams you once had for yourself. But for Alyson, owner of dotdotdash, the dream didn’t go away. With three kids, ranging in age from 11 to two, a wonderful husband, and everything she could ever want, Alyson has the perfect life. Yet she wondered, “Why don’t I feel perfect inside?”

Alyson shares the internal dialogue that inspired her to start this sweet little storefront boutique tucked in a great St. Louis neighborhood. After waking up from the new mom fog she asked herself, “Do you still really want it? Then you need to take it.” So there.

The business that a few years ago meant boxes and boxes of shirts on her dining room table has grown steadily into what you see here… a line of soft, comfortable casual wear for busy moms who need easy-going clothes. Just to drive home the message that you don’t have to spend a fortune to feel great, Alyson gave us each $100 credit to put together a mix and match outfit. Of course, with Alyson as our personal shopper, who could go wrong?

Your dream might not be your own little shop of fill-in-the-blank-here. It might be, like Heidi Howe’s, recording an album. Or, writing a book. Whatever your dream is, give it some space and time in your life. I’ll say it yet again: how can we teach our children to pursue their dreams if we do not give ourselves permission to do the same?! If you didn’t catch what Alyson said… “You hope that they [your children] find their passion within.”

Full disclosure: Alyson Garland is a dear friend. Our kids are dear friends. And, she’s my personal dresser! *wink* And may be Zen Mommy’s from now on as well! If you watch our videos regularly, almost everything I wear is from her shop in Demun.

Stop by Dotdotdash and tell them MyMommyManual sent you over. You’ll get 15% off your purchase! Thank you, Alyson for sharing the love.

And take a look-see what Kelli and Melody and Suzanne and Danyelle took home at The Fashion Haul of All Fashion Hauls. Actually, Danielle is posting a full write-up with prices and such!

Love you, fabulous St. Louis Mamas! (more pics below)

Sign up! *wink* We’ll keep reminding you to take care of YOU and your dreams! [Read more…]