I said to a friend the other day, “I’m having my demons over for lunch. Would you and yours care to join me?”
I figure if I’ve got them, demons I mean… and I do, I might as well get to know them better. My friend couldn’t make lunch that day, but it sparked a great conversation and ultimately led to this post.
All this focus on examining my demons started after a soul searching night spent listening to Paul Coutinho speak in St. Louis, Missouri. Paul is an incredible speaker, the author of How Big is Your God, Just As You Are… and lucky for me, spends half his time in his homeland of India and the other half teaching theology at St. Louis University.
What was the topic of his talk you ask? For me, it was all about l-o-v-e. Paul shared a number of compelling ideas, but the part of his talk that intrigued me the most was when he encouraged us to make friends with our demons.
On this night, I had an ah-ha moment. In his simple way, Paul’s words brought home to me the idea that we, each of us, are mystics NOT in our strengths… but in our weaknesses. I wish I could insert a pause. I’d have one here. It bears repeating.
We are mystics in weakness and through weakness, we grow.
Practical Mommy has got the right idea here because our demons require us to know them. They do not like to be ignored. More than that, I would go so far as to say, they demand our love. There’s that word again. Yes, L-O-V-E. The better we can know, love and accept the motley crew of traits and tendencies EACH and every one of us have, the better we can BE loving.
Our demons can only ruin things for us if we keep them hidden in the deep dark basements of our souls. Instead, let’s move them into the light where we can see them. Let’s invite them over for lunch because they are an important bunch to know. It’s not in spite of our demons that we grow, it is through them.
So how can one come to love one’s demons? It starts when we welcome them as friends, and take the time to get to know them. I’ve been spending time with mine. It typically goes something like this: “Oh hello control-freak, come on in! Hey self-doubt, grab a seat. Welcome back fear-of-not-having-or-being-enough, missed you!” These are my weaknesses. My fears. My demons. And they are also my greatest opportunities for experiencing divine wisdom and love. Instead of fighting or denying them, I’d like to call them out by name. I want to set a place for them at the table that is my life. They are all a very real part of that which is me. If I can’t love them, then I can not love me.
Today look at our dark sides. Have lunch with our dark sides. Love our dark sides. And in doing so, let’s be reminded of our light. Let’s experience the fullness of bliss and the greatness that lives within each of us even in, especially in, our weaknesses. Let’s remember always, whether dark or light, we are love. This is who we are. It’s our birthright, so let’s claim it!
Suzanne Tucker aka Zen Mommy is co-creator of My Mommy Manual.com and co-owns a holistic health center in St. Louis, Missouri with her husband Shawn. She practices as a Certified Educator of Infant Massage and health education teacher. Certified in a number of healing life education approaches, Suzanne offers parent coaching one on one and through YogaParenting, an eight week online course helping parents create more joy and less stress.